back from texas and more...

Our family has just returned from Texas where we spent time with my parents, 86 and 87, who are amazingly plugging away at life and ministry.  We also saw my three brothers and family - did the cousin thing and enjoyed it all.  I will tell you more about my parents in a later space.

Meanwhile, I help lead a large homeschool co-op locally and also have the opportunity to teach a downtown women's lunch/bible study.  I am working hard on both and am pouring over what topics to cover in the luncheon-study.  Businesswomen from all over the downtown Orlando area come into a classy, decorated atmosphere, are served by numerous ladies from the sponsoring church, enjoy a great lunch made by an amazingly creative cook, then listen in to a teaching time.  The response has been amazing this past year so I will get to do it again this fall.  The question I am asking is, "What would working women want to hear about in the middle of their busy day, over lunch?  My goal is not too heavy, not too light, not too serious, not too silly, but practical, with humor, and uplifting, whatever the topic is.  I want them to go out smiling and encouraged, with a little better glimpse of our God.  I am considering a study on  women of the Bible, but then thought that it would be hard to invite a co-worker to come to lunch and learn about "Deborah" - Deborah who????  You would really have to know about these people to want to come.  Then I thought about an in-depth look at the Lord's Prayer and what each line represents in a prayer life.  Hmmmm.  Another thought I had, was to tackle the "giants in our lives"...like fear, discouragement, hurt, pain, failure, etc.  Maybe I could take one giant per week and talk about it and what God has to say in His Word about how to take on that giant - that would be something you could invite anyone to.  I think I would like to attend that one.  Anyway...

my seventh child just got his learner's permit - teaching a seventh child to drive - only one more after him to go - wow!  Talk about "prayer life" - teaching teen boys to drive is one way to increase your praying, quickly.  But we are making it!  This is my very fun 6'3" 15 year old who has had the ongoing struggle with how to "focus" on things in life (like school).  When he asked if I could picture him driving me around, I said, "NOOOOO!!!" but I was only kidding.  It may teach him to focus!  Wouldn't you trust this guy?? 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He really is a great guy and so much fun...tenderhearted, serious about the Lord.  God is teaching him a lot this summer - through ministries like teenpact and through his own Bible study and involvement with other young people.  He and Zachary are also learning how to play instruments and lead in worship - very fun to see them grow!

I did watch a youtube this morning that touched my heart.  I long, as many of you do, for the "church" to be all it can be in our generation - to be real and powerful and full of God's creative work - and this is a little glimpse into that.  How secure these people were and once again, as my husband says, "It is a reminder that the church should be the safest place on earth."  If you have not seen it, watch "cardboard testimonies" and respond - it is very powerful!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Modern Day Hero - my sister-in-love

Life is full of twists and turns for everyone. As one book I read several years ago said, "Life is chaotic" (Finding God, by Larry Crabb). And it doesn't seem to be changing except for the worse. An amazing aspect of life though, is that in the midst of all of the mystery and chaos, there are people who ride the waves of life with great courage, strength, and grace. That is my sister-in-love. This year she has been diagnosed with breast cancer, which took the life of her older sister just a few years ago. Now she faces the same disease, but is doing so in a most gracious, faith-building way. She, her daughters, husband, and church family got together recently to form a club when she cut her hair before chemo started. Not just anyone could be in this new club; it was the "Dana's Hair Club for Men", involving men and boys who wanted to join Dana in cutting off their hair. Each man or boy got their own certificate and business cards to take them through the time frame of the chemotherapy.

With incredible courage, Dana cut the hair of those attending and hers was also cut that night. Her smiles have taken her through that night, as well as the most recent rounds of chemotherapy. Dana, you have been and are one classy lady, a dear friend, and I am so thankful that you are my sister-in-love. I could not love you more if you were my own sister. Thank you for your gift of courage and strength that blesses all who know you. We are on your team and pray that God sees you through to a great victory of LIFE!

Before the scissors began clicking...

 

 

 

This is Dana cutting my brother's hair; he is the pastor of the church and Dana's husband.

 

Dana has been a barber by trade so it was everyone's turn to get her back for all the hair cuts of the past! This is my brother cutting her hair. Now that would be scary!

The club with Dana and my brother, Gary, in the middle!

Now this is real church life - touching people where they really are. What an amazing group who would shave their heads to love Dana.

Dana, my brother, and their two daughters. They have definitely learned the fine art of scarf tying. At chemotherapy sessions, Dana teaches other women how to tie their scarves. This is the stuff great people and families are made of - making it together through the chaos of life - hanging on to the One True Person and Promise we have - Christ! You are all amazing! 
    Dana, May the God of peace himself make you entirely pure and devoted to God; and may your spirit and soul and body be kept strong and blameless until that day when our Lord Jesus Christ comes back again. God, who called you to become his child, will do all this for you, just as he promised.                                    1 Thes. 5:23-24 (Living) 

A GREAT MAN

Yesterday, we celebrated the birth of a great man in history; he is a man whom few know much about. That is usually the case, that the truly great men are little known. They do not seem to mind. But if there were more of this type of man in our world, what a difference it would make. In fact, it would change the world. This particular man is a man with great vision, a man of humility, a leader, a calm, patient and kind man, one who's convictions run deep, but his love runs deeper. He is not a reactionary man; he thinks before he speaks. And when he speaks, what he says is important. He is optimistic when things around him are discouraging. He smiles at the future, even when it is uncertain, because of his unrelenting faith in a God Who keeps His promises. He loves his wife and children and is committed to them in ways that few could ever understand. I wish every man could spend time with this man - to learn his ways and follow his heart. Yes, his heart - it is the greatest part about this man. It is full of wisdom and understanding that come through in every day life situations. He does not push himself on anyone and does not ever feel he must be the center of attention. He does not give up; he assumes the best about people; he looks out for the interests of others more than his own. He is truly an amazing person. He is my husband of almost 30 years and the father of all eight of my incredible children. He never pushes them to be what he wants them to be, but he is always there for whatever they are doing.  We may only have one daughter, but he dances with her as well. 

He is now not only dad, but G-daddy, a very significant player in the life of three little grandsons and all of those grandchildren to come. I pray that his children and grandchildren grow up to imitate the heart of "this great man." (He always had a little song he would hum to get them to go to sleep - he still sings it)

One son wrote....

"Hey Dad...I want to tell you that I love you and that I consider it a joy to have grown up under your fathering. I still remember when you would sing and pray with us before we went to bed. Those types  of things laid a foundation of love and care that has made me who I am. You have always demonstrated what it means to be a man of integrity, servant, father, hard worker, thinker, and teacher. Those things are what is central to biblical masculinity. Happy birthday! Know that I love you and am looking forward to growing even closer to you as I enter these next stages of my life."

Happy Birthday Bob and dad - at the end of the day I told him that I was so grateful that on this day in history, God chose to make such a great man...one about whom a book may never be written, but one who has changed our world. Your smile is a blessing to us - we love you - Joy, kids, and grandchildren!

Tag, I am it - Weird Worship

Okay I have been tagged by a blog savvy friend to be a part of a meme about weird worship. What in the world is a meme? I had to contact the blogger who tagged me to get an idea of what it meant to be tagged (haven't played that game in a while) and how I respond to it. So here I am...the original request was, “Please give us five examples of Weird Worship and tag five more people to do the same.” The person who tagged me did not follow the original rules, and did her own thing in her quite hilarious response! Now I am a rules person for sure, but this particular concept of "weirdness in worship" immediately brought things to mind that I wanted to say...so I will. It will be a combination of serious and humorous thoughts. If you have been going to church as long and often as I have (since the womb) and you have watched the worship wars develop over the last couple of decades, you just have to laugh when you consider all that is out there. One challenge was issued to my husband and me in the first church we served in, 30 years ago. After the time of worship through music in the service, the pastor would rise and remind the congregation that Christians lie the most when they sing..."every day with Jesus is sweeter than the day before"...must not see the Christians I see in church..."wherever He leads, I'll go"...WHAT? No way I'm going there!..what about "I Surrender All"...whoa, I don't think so, not my ______!

Once this was pointed out to us, years ago, we were reminded of the importance of considering the words we were singing in church services. I have tried to made it a point to drop out when the words were not true of me, or I would make the words a prayer as I sang, asking the Lord to make the words true in my own heart...Nothing like a little accountability.

Another area of worship that seems a little weird at times is when people sing songs that don't make sense - people often write a song where they strain to connect their words to "God thoughts"...recently someone sang a song comparing God to "sweet butter." We still have not gotten over that one! He's been compared to motorcycles, rain, a cool breeze, a warm blanket...and now, sweet, creamy butter. I guess it just makes the point that it is impossible to describe God - there are no words that capture Who He is! Worship songs are just our feeble attempt on earth to talk about and talk to an awesome God, with music.

I do get frustrated when we sing those "I can't sing this one" worship songs - A lot of the newer stuff is very difficult to follow and sing along - none of this verse and chorus stuff - it just goes on and on and switches melodies every few words or so. Of course, traditional hymns in the keys that they were written in, are some of the most difficult songs to sing of all. Only if you grew up hearing them, do you really appreciate them. But more contemporary, hip leaders (the ones with their shirttails out and ripped up jeans and flip flops) often forget that we are out there trying to sing along with them and they go off on their own vocal gymnastics and there we are.

Okay I'll quit with this one - one of my least favorite things is trying to focus on words and sing to the Lord or about the Lord, all while the cameras are focusing on the singers/musicians on the stage, with close up shots of them on the screen. I am sure this is my problem, as the cameraman zooms in on what they are wearing, and all the details of a closeup view. I feel distracted when there is a lot going on instead of just being able to focus on the Lord.

Well worship is weird - how do you sing to the Lord, about the Lord - why do we do it - is it to only praise Him or is it to edify those who are singing with us. What if we cannot stand the music, the loudness, the instruments, the guy on the guitar or drums, or is it the guy in the suit waving his arms. We have seen so many changes in worship mode, but I am not sure if we are making progress. Wonder what God thinks of it all! 

Moms' Day every day!

"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."  Elizabeth Stone

While I am not sure who Elizabeth Stone is, I like the visual she presents in this quote. And I happen to have 8 children, so I have a lot of my heart walking around out there. Some days I feel it more than others!

I know that many are unable to bear children, and know that is a pain so difficult to bear. I do not take that fact lightly. And I am also aware that in this self-absorbed culture, that many choose to not have children...I have to assume that they are unaware of the gifts that children are and the blessings that they bring to your life (along with other things)! But It is at this time of year, Mother's Day, that I usually pause to remember my precious mom, who is alive and 87 today. Many have not had a mom to emulate and follow after, but I have a selfless mom who has set the pace before me. She still emails (yes she emails) to remind me of things only a mom would think of. Then, I write each of my children and remind them of my love for them and why I feel the way I do about them. It is just a different twist on the day -Happy "I'm so glad to be your mom" Day!

Now don't get me wrong - I am not one of those who will sugar-coat any experience - I happen to believe that it is absolutely one of the hardest and busiest careers anyone could ever have, especially single moms. I lose sleep over my children; I cry over my children; I work hard for and with my children; I am learning to pray more for my children; and I even get mad at my children! But I love them, enjoy them, laugh with them, sing with them, play with them, serve them, and I just plain like them!

What a privilege - what an idea - to carry, for almost a year, a growing life - a most precious treasure (hard work), then birth that treasure into this world (more hard work) -then have the opportunity to nurture and teach that treasure and especially to bring this treasure up in the Lord and to fight for and protect this treasure, until he or she can choose wisdom for himself (did I say hard work??) - then have the challenge of releasing, one at a time, each treasure, whom you have poured your very heart and life into since the day of conception (more heart work) - releasing that treasure to now make his or her mark on this dark world, for the Kingdom of God that you have sought to place in each of their hearts - motherhood! Wow! I get tired just thinking about it. Yet, it is nearly impossible for anyone, other than mom, to understand its depth, its challenges, its heartaches, its longings, and its joys - it is truly a "heart" investment - it never ends, but its role changes with time.

I find myself regularly in the releasing mode in these days, and for you moms of little ones, it really does come, I promise, and it is sooner than you ever imagined! It is a challenging hard time for me since I have some slight control issues - yet it is right and good! Now it is their turn to go and to touch the world. I have touched mine.

Happy Moms' Day to all moms - the contented ones, the longing ones, the heart-broken ones - you are amazing and precious! Keep going and never give up! The love of the Heavenly Father is great toward you and all of your treasures! To my treasures - I deeply love each of you and could not be more proud and thankful to be "mom" - your mom! Happy "I'm so glad to be your mom," day!

The Confused Church

I have just finished reading a couple of books that interested me. One was Jim and Casper Go to Church, a book about a Christian, who for the sake of research and writing the book, takes an atheist, Casper, all over America to visit church services. With their laptops on hand, they would sit through services, then dialogue about the results, recording their insights for the future writing. Casper's comments were more than intriguing and even comical at times. They went from small to large churches, liturgical to free-spirit, from coliseum to small store-front, wealthy to barely making it, well-known to unknown, flashy pastors to no pastor - so they covered all types of gatherings.  Being a pastor's daughter, with brothers in ministry, and married to a pastor, things about the church are always on my radar screen. Whenever we think we have seen it all in church life, we see one more thing and are amazed!  The nagging question that Casper, the friendly atheist poses throughout the book is, "Is this what Jesus told you guys to do?"  He saw it all and wondered if what we (Christians) say about Jesus is true, is this what he meant for us to be doing - church as he saw it across the nation? Is this it? It is like the old Peggy Lee (who's she?) song, "Is That All There Is? I answer in my own simple way, "I don't think so." 

Today, new churches are springing up everywhere and in all flavors. We have heard so much about different types of churches: purpose-driven church,  liturgical church, reformed church, emergent church, age-integrated church, missional church, post-modern church, family church, and recently even the "simple church." But even trying to be one of those seems complicated. So I have declared in my state of the church address to myself, that we are in the day of "the confused church."

"Light shows, fog machines, worship bands, offering plates - is this what Jesus intended?" Great question and yet I don't think we have to take Casper's interpretation of church life as the "gospel", but I am so ready for my generation to ask the questions Casper was asking. You may just have to read the book. What do you think? I am searching and inviting you to ask God maybe for the first time, "What did you have in mind when you said 'church' in the New Testament?" What is our mission? What kind of church will we be a part of? Will our children see and know the reality of God through our church? How will we in this generation lead people to be followers of Christ, and not the church, especially the confused church? I have hope there is an answer!

Turning "13" in an upside-down world

How do you celebrate a special girl's 13th birthday in such an upside-down world - where girls that age no longer go get an ice cream cone with mom and dad, but are getting their social needs met by boyfriends on the internet, cell phone calls, and instant messaging. Pictures of pouty faced girls are everywhere in the media - a look of temptation and provocativeness - cell phone images are being passed around - girls looking for a moment of fame - their heroes are young girls themselves who have already sold themselves to the media.

I knew that I wanted my daughter to get a different message from us on her birthday...that turning 13 was a milestone and something to be celebrated in her spiritual journey - that we celebrate her value and worth as a gift from God, but it was not a license to pursue the culturally popular track so common today!  Now I know that daughters can make that choice even with parents who are really trying, so I am not judging anyone. In fact a friend of ours from the past has written a book and has a website just for this topic: Pastor Charles Stone and his daughter, Heather tell the story of their relationship through her tumultuous teenage years.

Back to the "13th" birthday - I decided to use an "enchanted" theme and utilize the best I had at home - "the men in our lives" - daddy (the king) and "the brothers"  joined me in making one enchanted day for our princess - the only daughter with 7 brothers (knights in shining armor).

 

With the invitation arriving early in the morning of the enchanted day and a tiara to make this princess feel special, our daughter launched out into the kingdom (she was such a great sport to wear the tiara proudly all day!) 

 

Following riddle clues, she met each of her brothers throughout the day for surprise activities - "breakfast with Brandon" where he told her she could have as much chocolate milk as she wanted - now it doesn't get better than that!

  "photo shoot with Kirk" at the lakefront - he is our amateur photographer -

 

 

"lunch with Zachary and Clayton" (her favorite - burritos and sparkling cider)

 

- movie and shopping (for royal wardrobe) with  mom and a close friend -

at the end of the day -

          outdoor dinner for two with dad, by lantern light -

picked up after dinner for coffee with Ryan and Wesley - at Starbucks -

Each event was accompanied by a clue written in Old English on parchment type paper, speaking words of blessing over the enchanted princess. Each brother was to tell her the story of where they were and how they responded (if old enough) to the addition of a daughter to a houseful of boys, 13 years ago. Then they were to share with her a special tribute. The smile on our daughter's face at the end of the day was a treasure.

What a challenge to raise up our children in this culture that is so hardened to right and so accepting of wrong. Sometimes I get tired of the fight for their purity and safety, until they can choose it themselves, but about that time I read an article like, "The Cellular Generation" and I am off and running again. Our children are gifts and treasures of great worth. We must do what it takes to bring them up in a way that directs them toward God and His goodness - no matter what the cost!

My words for you sweet Mary,

       "Many daughters have done nobly,   But you excel  them all." Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Proverbs 31:29-30 (NASB)    I love you - mom

In Need of God's Grace

  

Grandchildren are so precious, especially when you do not see them very often. The time that I spend with mine becomes more precious every time I see them. Of course it is always wonderful to get to go to the mountains in springtime Tennessee, in order to visit my grandsons.  Redbud trees (which are lavender) were blooming everywhere, as well as the dogwood trees.  Tulips were up as well as other spring flowers.  It was refreshing and peaceful everywhere we looked. As we boarded the plane for home, I was reminded of God's grace, watching the sun set on the mountains Tuesday evening. Author Jerry Bridges, says it well about grace, "Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace." That means that every day, no matter what kind of day it is, we need to relate to God and live life from His grace alone...there is no other way that works.

We were also able to hear our oldest son speak at  Celebration Church where he serves...posing the question to us out of Acts 17, "How much of your Christianity is cultural and how much of it is biblical?"  It was a great message from a great passage about Paul on a visit to Athens. Cultural Christianity is popular and do-able in America, but what does real biblical Christianity look like in this day?  I am always on a search to find out.

While in northeast Tennessee, we celebrated a 5th birthday with Tobin, celebrated "fun" with Josiah, and celebrated "life" with Jude, who has Tuberous Sclerosis. What is ahead for each of them and what does God have in mind for their lives?  Prayer will be the key, and I know that I am learning that more and more in life.  It is the only place to go on behalf of our children, grandchildren and others in our lives. There are many conflicting thoughts out there today for moms and grandmoms - pulling us away from our  main mission of working at home and taking care of our families. The promise of reliving our youth, a more fulfilled lifestyle, travel, escape from responsibilities...the Oprah message of "the secret" - leaving behind all that is negative in your life. Be careful who you listen to.

Being a follower of Christ is not for the fainthearted,

Luke 9:23-25 (Msg) 
    Jesus said,  "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat—I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?"

Finding yourself by giving yourself away - - the way of the mom - the way of the grandmother (me-mom) - the way of the follower of Christ!

Jude, you are precious and loved by God. The limitations and physical struggles you are experiencing are in His hands - His grace is there for you - He will never leave you - He is for you! And I love you!   me-mom

"I Needed a Policeman!"

 

Okay I am taking a new step. Realizing that not everyone wants to hear the ramblings of a mom moving through new seasons, I am trying to make this my "family" oriented blogging moment and I am using another place to talk more about what I am learning in life, seeking to follow Christ. Now, I do have to take a "number" at the computer since there are multiple users in the family. You moms with little ones out there; just wait, you will be moving over sooner than you think.

The pictures are of my second son, Brandon, who is a college graduate in Criminal Justice and is now officially a sworn-in sheriff for our county. Wow! What a moment and how I am learning a new way to pray when I wake up in the night, since he is on the 5 p.m. to 5 a.m. shift in a more volatile area (which is really everywhere these days - even Wet 'n Wild this past weekend). He is named after my dad, his pappaw, BranDON MILLER - a name that carries with it so much legacy - so much humor (which Brandon loves) - and so much spiritual depth - which we continue to pray for Brandon to grow in and possess all the days of his life.

Brandon was my baby and little boy, who was calm, sensitive, fun, stable, low-key, happy, peaceful...shall I go on? He also had a knack for stepping in when things got a little crazy with "the brothers" (which was often in our household, and still is), and he would mediate, trying to take things in his hands and help work it out. I would usually come on the scene and say, "Brandon, mom doesn't need you to be a policeman." And now, 20+ years later, I am saying, "I guess I did and didn't know it."

I have a "clear as day" memory of the first time I nursed him after arriving at home from the hospital in our little 600 square foot house, while in seminary. After having to rock our firstborn to sleep or having Bob dance around with him - (he loves music and movement), I laid Brandon down in the cradle, on his stomach, and he never moved or made a sound. I had to look at him several times to make sure he was okay - his eyes were wide open, but he lay there quietly till he fell asleep...he was one low-key guy!

We are extremely proud of Brandon - We have been blessed from the moment he came into our world and blessed even now in his calling and his vocation. Brandon, may you keep a sensitive heart in a very bitter, disrespectful, calculating, violent world. May you follow the path of Christ always - may you live up to the name that God led us to choose just for you. I respect you, admire you, trust you, believe in you, and most of all - love you!  mom

Life is Hard, But God is Here

"Where is God?" That is the question people ask, assuming that there is an answer that says he has stepped out for a moment or is not on the job like He should be. It's as if His presence should be known by whether He is on our time table, fixing our problems, and making things happen for us. The real answer is that He is here with me as I work through the issues of my life - He is there for my sister-in-love, married to my brother Gary, as they walk through the first stages of her breast cancer and chemotherapy - He is there for my little grandson with his daily seizures. He is there for my boys who are searching for direction for their futures - He is already out of ahead of them. He is in Afghanistan with missionary friends - He is with the children and women being lifted from the compound in El Dorado, Texas. God is big and He is near. What a mystery!

We don't have to take God somewhere so that He'll be there, and we don't have to hope He will go where we go or show up somewhere when we want Him to. He is already there - we just have to see Him and help others find Him right there in their midst. I had to smile when I read one author say that if you think you have to take God somewhere, you need to know that "God is very heavy!" I like that

One friend reminded me recently in looking back over a difficult past that the reason she does not constantly grieve it, is that she knows that God is as in charge of her  past, as He is her present, and is of her future. He covers it all. I guess that is why Jesus, Paul, and others told us not to worry - not be be anxious - God would take care of us. Somehow knowing that God is "omnipresent" - a big word that means He is everywhere - I am comforted. He is not limited to my location or my small knowledge of Him. Today - He is here with me, but there with you - He is not limited by geography or time - we just need to recognize Him - He is real and a Comforter to those who need Him.